GOT SOME 'SPLAININ' TO DO

first of all, the fart contests were conducted before we got married. This was a game the Webb boys
and Little Bobby Linder used to do at one of the neighborhood movie theaters. Apparently they
would sit in different sections of the theater and then work up to a good one, trying to let it fly when
it was extremely quiet so no one could possibly miss it. Then someone would yell, way to go Clyde,
or whoever the perp was at the time. Roy said he was not a participant, but Bev said he was. They
did not do this in front of their girlfriends, as it definitely was not a way to impress girls.

Another thing, you did not want to go as see a sad movie with Bob Linder. He would actually be
sobbing out loud throughout the movie and it usually ended up with everyone else laughing because
Bob almost became hysterical with his weeping. I witnessed that when we went to see Sentimental
Journey.

Now................about my crazy Aunt Dorothy. I want to put a disclaimer on this blog. Anything I
write in here is not done with malice. Each story has been a part of my life, and something we have
laughed about over the years. My Aunt Dorothy gave herself the nickname of crazy. She would
call or come over and say This is your crazy Aunt. Of course we all knew immediately. She was
married to my Mother's brother, My uncle Herman. Uncle Ermy as I called him when I was very
little would come to our house, we lived on the second floor, and would whistle up the back stairs,
and this toddler (me) would run to the stairs calling Uncle Ermy, Uncle Ermy and he would run
up the stairs and pick me up and let me ride his shoulders. Of course, every boyfriend that I ever
had would hear that story and then he said and "she peed on my shoulders" My uncle was an
alcoholic, but a genius. I really don't know where or when he met Aunt Dorothy. Story has it she
came from a wealthy family and when she started to get serious about Uncle Herman, her family
disowned her. They married and had 4 boys, Jimmy, Danny, Larry and Freddy. Today those
boys have great jobs, families and are well educated. My uncle invented the Jet engine, long before
it was the "in" thing, but not having money topatent it his ideas were stolen. They lived in a shack
with cardboard boxes straightened out for walls, down by the railroad tracks. There was lots of
love in that home, but not much else. Somehow they always fixed a meal when we were there, and
of course there was always beer in the frig. One day Aunt D was going to hide the beer, so she put
the cans in the oven. Next morning she got up, forgetting about the beer, she turned on the oven
to take the chill out of the house. When she finally remembered, she opened the oven and the beer
was almost boiling and the cans were rockin and rollin, she grabbed them and threw them in the
ice cube section of the frig. Naturally when my uncle got up he immediately went to the frig for
his beer and drank two of them down and then told us my Aunt had tried to poison him. Anyway
he died when we were in Calif. and I didn''t know any of the details, but apparently after he was
gone Aunt D was reunited with her family and in their good graces again. I think when they died
she inherited and maybe that's how the boys were able to go to college. I know Freddy (now
prefers to be phonetically correct and called Phred) is a teacher. I saw all of the boys but Larry
when we had the reunion in Montana.

OHMYGOSH takes so much to get around to my crazy Aunt. She came to California one year just
before Christmas. My folks were living with Darlene and Jack at the time in Hacienda Heights. Aunt
Dorothy stayed with us a few days and then with Darlene & Jack. She was so funny, she never wanted
to impose (as if she could) I remember making a ham dinner one night. She ate with us but would
only eat her balogna sandwich. She wanted to go to the market one day, so Dawn, Beth and Mike
said they would take her to Manuel's market. They took the short cut thru the fields. It had rained
the day before, and when they got to the ditch, it had water in it. Dawn jumped over, Beth jumped
over, and Mike jumped over and Aunt Dorothy jumped in. We heard about that for days. My
folks took her to Knott's Berry Farm and were going for the Chicken dinner. She would not go in
and waited outside while my parents had dinner. She by that time, had money, (even tho my folks
were treating) but somehow with the life she had, she could not spend it. She brought $50 with
her for three weeks spending,including christmas gifts for all the kids. She was fun tho, and when
she and my mom got together no telling what would happen, especially if there were drinks involved.

I understand from one of the boys that she died a few years after my mother, and had laid in her
apartment for days before she was discovered. She loved us, and we loved her, but I will never
forget the way she looked when she came back from Manuel's market.

I get e mails from Sandy, Phred's wife. They live in Duluth. Jimmy is in Milwaukee. They are all
quite a bit younger than I am. Ardis, my cousin in Montana keeps in close touch with them all.
They are more her age.

OK, next time our adventures in the Army at Ft. Lee Va.